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The Anchor Keeping her from RunningAcross it runs through the skin,
Pain quickly escapes the wrist,
Thoughts of death crosses her mind,
Insecurity and guilt is controlling the blade,
Deeper and deeper the thoughts take it.
The woman kept speaking all the things wrong
Going down the list,
Comes another slit,
Another memory from the past,
Comes a thought of taking her own life.
One thing stops her from going deeper,
One thing stops her from going down instead of across,
One thing is clouding her mind from stopping herself,
His name and his face and the memories of him and telling
her she's his is keeping her from running away from the world.
This Quote is Inspiring“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things
that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.
So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
Pleading For an AnswerGive me a minute to catch my breath,
The tears need to be pushed away,
My efforts to appease,
It has grown into failure.
Pleading for an answer,
When am I going to be released from this prison,
Fear has become my biggest emotion.
Suffocating myself with assumptions and accusations,
Paranoia roots deep within my heart,
Piercing like spikes of silver and rust.
The shackles cut my skin holding me down,
Poisen clouds my mind and veils my heart,
Desperation of crawling out these bars,
Forming situations over and over in my head.
I'm pleading for an answer,
When am I going to be released from this prison?
Fear has become my biggest emotion.
Patience comes before FreedomThis is all for her,
She’s never acted like she gave a damn about me,
If she would've raised me like she should have,
She would have an understanding of who I really am,
Don’t you fathom what will be in a year to come?
I don’t think she’ll ever come to sense about her actions.
I want her to stop and think,
Think of all the times she’s stole from me,
Can she save her poisoned breath?
It’ll only be a waste of her time.
Dreams of hearing her heart slowing down to the seconds of death,
But I need her alive,
Ears and eyes clear and open,
So she can feel every moment when I break her heart into pieces.
Will I be free soon?
Free to live without my fears?
How soon can I hear this prayer I pray each night?
I so want to believe,
So I can stay strong for another year,
Another year believing it’ll get better.
My head it telling me to be the woman,
That can understand,
One that can learn to become more patient in the stressful event in life,
To be free,
You're the reasonPeople may think it's crazy,
But I've been walking through rain I thought would never end,
You came along like the light at the end of a storm,
The first sound of your laugh made my heart melt,
You make me feel like I've never felt before,
Something told me that I knew you weren't just some boy who'd spoken to me.
Oh love, you're the reason my heart is beating,
You're the reason for the smile on my face,
You're the reason I still believe,
You're the reason I still have hope,
Oh baby, you're the reason I still have my feet anchored to the ground.
Heart BeatingIt all began with a smile,
And the next thing I knew,
It was making me feel wild,
The look in his eyes,
That moment I know as the world begins to fade away,
The way my hand fits in his,
It's like finally finding the missing piece to a puzzle,
His arms around me feels like home,
His lips pressed against mine make me never want to let go,
Noticing the way we act like total dorks.
Or the way he cares about me,
Thats when I knew,
That my heart was beating for him.
PrisonStuck in a prison,
When am I going to be called for bail?
Every time you touch me it burns like fire,
Your voice feels like poison in my ears,
Your words mean nothing to me,
Your presence gives off a vibe of a prison guard.
Judgement is thrown all around,
Glares of embarrassment,
I'm ready for you to go back down below,
For the devil to come knocking on your door,
So all this pain can fade away.
Being bailed out will be the start of better days,
And the prison guard will be out of control.
Safe HarborFinally found my safe harbor,
You're the anchor I've dropped in the ocean,
With you all my fears wash away,
Every wind that blows my way,
You keep me steady through the wind,
You're the reason I'm warm throughout the storm.
The sound of your voice keeps me floating in this ocean,
When i start to sink you lift me back up,
You're my reason to keep hope,
Lets keep this love floating.
My Ship is SailingFinally letting a stream of broken memories sink away,
Just when I thought it was the end,
Along came floating a new beginning,
First I was hesitant,
But now I’m set out to sail the new horizons.
Can all these anchors release me from keeping me down?
I’ve never been one to do what I want,
Always have let my past keep me anchored down,
I’m tired the anchors chain keeping me stuck,
Oh, I’m ready to break through and sail away.
I’m ready to admit it,
Oh, this time can I admit it?
(No, no it’s too soon)
It tore me apart in the past,
But can I let it fade away?
It it time to be honest and take the risk?
Someone told me “You’re the happiest I’ve ever seen in months,
I promise you it’ll be worth the time,”
I can’t let my thoughts keep eating me away,
The feeling of his warmth has been my anti-depressant,
I’m ready to grab a hold of someone who makes me feel happy.
You're worth so much moreShe was the type
to cut her wrists,
and then swallow the
because looking at what
was even harder
but I want to tell her
to let the emotions
p i l
out of her mouth,
instead of her
and that I'll gladly
let the words slice me,
if it means
I Tear My Skin AwayI Tear My Skin Away
I tear this skin from my body,
Even if the world screams,
That I am only an illusion.
I tear the bones from my legs,
Through pain, I will grow,
Through suffering, I will become.
I rip the muscles from my arms,
These teeth from my jaws...
And with nothing upon me,
I carry on...
Like a broken puppet, still shivering,
Still forcing its way through the darkness;
I tremble for I am nothing...
And yet, I am moving. My voice still screams...
I draw breath into these tired lungs,
As I rip the flesh away...
And I shatter these mirrors before me,
With a voice that will not break:
Because the world cannot label me as nothing,
And I will live for my own sake!
"So tell me, is that all the pain you've got for me?"
You're beautifulPlease eat.
Are you listening to me?
If you are,
I want to tell you.
You re beautiful.
It doesn't matter what you weigh,
you shouldn't feel guilty about what you ate.
It doesn't matter,
I promise you things will get better.
Listen to my words,
Hold my hand.
Don't worry about the rest of the world,
It's okay if they don't understand,
How it feels like,
To feel fat,
To feel ugly,
To feel worthless.
You are none of those things.
It s okay to be chubby,
It s okay to be skinny.
Because you have a big heart.
And your smile,
Is like a priceless work of art.
And I don't want to see you destroy,
Because you're more than just a broken toy.
And to everyone else,
So for once let yourself be,
Accept your reflection.
Because you are the definition of perfection.
So don't worry,
Don't be sorry,
To be who you are.
Because you re,
Those Green Eyes (Or: Don't Lie to Your Kid)Those green eyes -
The green of joy
The green of hope
The green of love and acceptance -
Were always full of lies.
They first lied when I said,
After a nightmare at four am
When I was too small to reach a light switch,
“Will you ever leave me?”
And those eyes said,
Why did those green eyes
Shut when I needed them most?
"Are you okay?"
Would be a red line
That I would etch into myself
Those green eyes melted.
Those green eyes did shine
And I knew what it was -
I was young, not stupid -
But I indulged the lie,
For those green eyes.
"Will it get better?"
I asked one sunny Saturday
At ten in the morning
And those green eyes looked away;
“And you’ll be here forever?”
There were no words.
I made up my own affirmative.
Those green eyes -
When they saw
How I’d rubbed myself raw
notes on a matchbook love.if I were the type
to say how I really felt,
I'd tell you that
I hope you choke on your apologies
like they're arsenic
and your nails are already
with the poison.
I'd let you know
that I'll never be a body
for you to touch
just because I know that's all you want.
I'll never be a fairy in a bottle
at your waist.
this is no storybook, and
I am no myth.
hear my silence,
feel the cold absence
respond to your weak "I'm sorry"s.
I beg you,
stop digging the hole,
stop, just stop.
Hush and watch the flames
engulf the image you sold me.
you can tell me
I'm beautiful as much
as you want,
but I know that it's not enough,
that you'll always want more,
that you've been a wolf
between my legs all this time
and my fingers are bruised
from holding the leash.
now every time you whisper
"please be okay",
I will always tell you that
I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.
I will forever pretend
that I've grown up from you,
that I've become a mystery
What is Hope?Hope is something we have as children,
It helps us thrive and try our hardest.
Hope is what we express in the worst of times
When all hope seems lost.
Hope is what people possess in life
To work toward our dreams.
Hope is a lie
That's not worth our time.
AnxietyAnxiety tapping on my door,
"Can I come inside your head?"
I shiver, not ready for its visit.
It charges in, smelling of worry.
Spends a morning, afternoon and night,
playing with my emotions.
A marionette dancing its old tune on rough strings.
Leaves me winded and praying to beat it the next time.
I miss youYou are a ghost in my head
Living, yet you haunt my thoughts today
To speak your name
Would be to desecrate this space
Where you are, I should not care to know
But you are a never-healing wound
An unfulfilled promise
A chance to do no wrong
My memories burn with your taste, your touch, your smell
Who have I become?
Too long have the years been to me
To find myself wishing for the crossroads
For the chance to say no, one more time.
I Know You're Strong, Let's Be Stronger TogetherI Know You're Strong, Let's Be Stronger Together
if i’m being completely honest,
i can’t say i know what you’re goin’ through.
and if i’m being frank,
i’m sort of afraid to write this
because i’ve always been unsure
if i love too much but it’s my nature
and i’d rather lose by trying too hard
than to do so without doing enough.
i hope you’re asleep now
and i hope you don’t read this
till the morning and i hope by then
things will be a little lighter
but i’m hoping against hope
because if you don’t know,
i feel when things are off.
call it intuition, call it a feelin’,
say i just know it.
my friend, my door is always open
even when you’re feeling closed
off to the world and right there,
i can understand that feeling well,
because i still feel we relate to one another
better than most brothers understand their sisters.
know i look at you as a sibling
and i believe we know when the other
Blocking the thoughts"it's all a joke"
I want to go running for the danger.
"You know you need it"
I shake the thoughts away.
"your not really strong"
I turn my music up.
"Go ahead and grab it"
I throw it across my room.
"The pain is your medicine"
I turn the music up louder.
I pick my phone up,
And remember what i know is true.
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More